Monday, June 5, 2017

My Therapist Doesn't Like You

I try to make light of mental illness. I suffer from it, yes, but I think I somewhat-cope by searching funny quotes and memes that put a twist to the normally debilitating truth of depression. It makes you feel less alone, with having to take medication and go to talk therapy and all. I am not ashamed of either of those things and I'm a huge advocate when it comes to mental health awareness. I feel the lack of education and resources leads to our crippling homeless epidemic, drug addictions and suicides...

And today, I Google searched "my therapist doesn't like you"...

I see this sentence as funny and true. You talk about a lot of things in therapy; your past, your present, your future, who has hurt you, who you've hurt. You open yourself up ( at least I hope ) in a way you may never have before. And therapists see all sorts of people. At my last session, we discussed how I was recently described as toxic by a late friend. We talked a bit about it and then she said, "Jenn, as your therapist, I can tell you that you are not toxic. I see toxic people everyday, and you're not one of them." Therapists are non-biased and they don't tell you things they think you want to hear: they tell you the things you need to. 

So I searched this sentence. And although I didn't find any funny memes, what I did find were a few interesting charts/worksheets that I wanted to share. 

http://avpdcommunity.tumblr.com/post/141768494544/when-walking-the-middle-path-or-finding-the
This chart shows the different types of negative thinking styles. I know that I am apt to fall under a few of these, and I know numerous people who do, also ( although not all will admit it ) Read the chart--see if you recognize any of these thought patterns in your own behavior. And then I challenge you to do a little research on it. You always have the ability to change your attitude, but only if you want to.
https://www.quora.com/How-does-it-feel-to-have-people-step-on-you-all-the-time-and-find-yourself-angry-only-to-make-a-bigger-fool-of-yourself

The Personal Bill of Rights chart is one I found very interesting. As humans, we all have the right to certain things and that includes thinking for ourselves. I feel society makes us believe we are only likable if we say "yes" all the time, no matter how much it kills us inside...and that "freedom of speech" is only allowed to those who are outspoken. That is not the case. We all have the right to say no, change our minds and make our own decisions.

https://www.pinterest.com/explore/codependency-recovery/

Lastly, the chart on boundaries. Now this chart is mostly for co-dependency, but I also feel a lot of the points are valid in other situations. I am one who is still working on setting healthy boundaries with people, and it takes time. A lot of the things listed in the upper box are attributes I've had at one point in my life. But as you grow, you mature ( hopefully ) and aim to be more like the bottom box. I take it day by day, and with the help of my therapist and educating myself, I hope to approach situations far better than I once did. 

Life is all about changes. Some are welcomed and some are not. It's hard sometimes, but it's hard for everyone at at least one point. Each new day is an opportunity to be better than you were yesterday, and you can either choose to use it to grow...or you don't. Depression and anxiety are no excuse to be a shitty person--we are warriors and we can't let our chemical imbalances take hold and turn us into something we never wanted to be. Rise above, work hard and try to be a little better each day. 

Fake it 'til you make it, right?!