I was sitting at the table this morning eating a bowl of Frosted Shredded Mini-Wheats ( one of my faves ) and browsing through my Facebook feed when I came across a blog post that read:
"I Have A Fuck Off Fund, And So Should All Single Girls"
( you can read the original blog post by clicking above )
I have been saying this for YEARS, yo!
Back in 2006/07 I was in a prettttty shitastical relationship. I had the feeling that things were starting to get rocky, but we had just recently moved into a new apartment and I didn't know what I was going to do if we split. *May I say that no one should have to be put in such a situation* So I decided that year that I was going to take my entire tax refund and start a savings account. At the time, I was working for Roadway Trucking and was making decent money for a 21 year old, so I continued to save what I could each pay. When our relationship finally ended right before summer, I was fortunate enough to have the funds to put a security deposit and first month's rent down on my own apartment.
And from then on, I've just always had a savings account--whether it only have a few hundred, or a couple thousand in it.
...it's helped me on countless occasions since then.
But what I didn't like about the article is how it's mostly based on "if your man leaves you". Yes, it's common for relationships to not last. Yes, it's good to have a buffer and something to fall back on. But don't save money solely for that reason; save it for ALL the "what ifs" life has to offer.
-what if I need new tires?
-what if I break my ankle?
-what if the dog gets sick?
-what if my car breaks down?
-what if I lose my job?
When I used to tell others that I saved money "just in case things fell apart", they would tell me that I'm being pessimistic and that it was unhealthy for the relationship. I simply saw it as being a realist and making sure I can fend for myself if necessary. But my savings account has gotten me out of quite a few unexpected pickles in the last 10 years. So, if I learned anything from that craptacular relationship, it was that I need to be responsible so that I'm not left high-and-dry.
The author of this blog post, Ossiana Tepfenhart, writes as #10:
It's just a smart thing to do. Having a F*ck-Off fund is like having a fire hydrant. You never want to use it, but if you need it, it'll always be there. It gives you peace of mind just by existing, and that's an amazing gift.
"Sisters are doing it for themselves" these days and we cannot rely on a man, mommy/daddy, grandma, Aunt Deb or anyone else to take care of the sticky situations life throws at us.
There will always be break ups.
There will always be disasters.
There will always be unexpected monkey-wrenches thrown in for good measure.
Skip the Skinny-Mocha-Latte once a week. Keep a change jar. Set back an allotted amount from each pay. Tuck away unexpected monies you obtain. Have a yard sale. Sell shit on eBay. Having SOME sort of nest egg is essential!
Be smart. Be prepared. Take it in stride.