Tuesday, February 21, 2017

Much Love: February's Glam Bag

It's decided: come May, I will be switching from Ipsy glam bags to the Birchbox subscription...simply to try something new. Plus I have all these mini makeup bags now and nothing to do with them! ( they do make awesome purse carry-alls, though! )

This month's bag was alright. YET-A-FUCKIN-GAIN I was sent a lipstick!; luckily it doesn't look half bad and it's not a colored gloss-type lip color. Still not too happy about it, though--I don't know how many times I say that I do NOT like lipsticks.


So I'm also not a big fan of the jean-like appearance of this bag. Plus it doesn't seem as sturdy as bags in the past.

Anyways, on to the products:

NYX Butter Lipstick in Ripe Berry
Again with the fucking lipsticks...but it's a decent product. Glides on smooth, lasts a good bit-may be nice for a special occasion. But I live in scrubs and Lularoe so...lipsticks is rarely warranted...

Lord & Berry Line/Shade Eye Pencil in #221 Black
I'm more into liquid eyeliners these days, but this is a nice little pencil. Lines nicely but I haven't tried to smudge or shade with it, yet. I find it hard to do a clean cat-eye with a pencil.

The Organic Pharmacy Lip & Eye Cream
So far, I've only used this product once but I used it for both areas. I dabbed a bit under my eyes and then along the lines leading from my nose to the corners of my mouth. It's a thicker cream, so it stays in place. Pleasant/no smell, which is a plus. It was also nonirritating to my rather sensitive skin.

Marsk Mineral Eyeshadow in You're Toast
Pretty shade but I don't like anything that is a loose powder because I'm clumsy as fuuuuuuck and most of it ends up on the floor or my clothes...

True Botanicals Resurfacing Moisture Mask
Haven't used it yet...gonna try it tonight...smells good though!...

I'm hoping that my last two Ipsy bags are the best yet, but I have a feeling that will not be the case. Maybe I'm just bored with it? Who knows. It was fun while it lasted, though, and I'll still review March and April ( if anyone even reads this anyways, haha! )

...then just be on the lookout for some Birchbox reviews! 👍

See ya later, alligatorssssss!


Sunday, February 19, 2017

The Popular "Charcoal Peel Mask"

Back in the beginning of December, I was browsing Instagram when I came across an ad for a company called Trovido. The ad featured a beauty vlogger trying out a new charcoal mask in which the site had on sale for 50% off. So I did some investigating...

The site looked to be a pretty new company with a California address at the bottom. Seriously y'all, I searched high and low to find where the company was based from before I ordered. I also thought that $9.99 wasn't too bad for a product that may not work. So I said the hell with it and ordered one.

A few days later I received a confirmation that my package was sent...with a tracking number. Lo and behold...THE MOTHERFUCKING COMPANY WAS SHIPPING FROM CHINA!!!! *insert extremely pissed off face here*

Now, I get things from China, sure: my plugs, craft stuff...but with stupid ads on Facebook boasting "cute apparel for a small fraction of the cost" and you end up getting a piece of faux satin with half the seam coming out, I'm hesitant about clothing or beauty from overseas. And of course, their regulations are a lot looser than in the US...so then I'm thinking I'm gonna get lead poisoning or some shit...

ANYWAYS...

So three weeks go by...and I don't get my product; I email the company. Immediately someone responds and asks me to wait another 2 weeks, which I'm like, "Okay, it IS Christmas time...they probably got overloaded" But theeeeen...two months have gone by, I have not received my product, I email them AGAIN and...nothing. Luckily I was smart enough to purchase through PayPal, so I put in a dispute with PayPal, the company refunds my money and suddenly "receives" and responds to my customer service email. I get my $14.95 back, though.

Well, last week I receive a package in the mail: it's the face mask. So yeah, I DID get it...and I ended up getting it for free...

Score!

That night, I decide to try the mask. I'm super psyched because I've been infatuated with all the awesome videos of it extracting like, the most disgusting shit in our pores and, well, I got this for free and didn't have to pay $40 at Sephora for a tube. This is what the product looks like:


So yeah, it's in Chinese. The box, the tube...just a few words in broken English. Thankfully, it doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out how to use a face mask. I washed my face, dried and applied.


I decided to only apply to a few areas instead of my entire face, just because I didn't know how it was going to turn out. It dried in about 10-15 minutes and actually has a very pleasant scent to it. So far, so good.

Once I took the mask off, though, I wasn't as pleased as I was hoping to be:


The mask dried a lot thinner than the masks I've seen online, and when you look at the mask afterwards...I don't see much. You can't really tell if something is a blackhead or a bubble. It does seem to pull a bit of peach fuzz with it, but I don't think it is too uncomfortable to remove. I will say that my face feels very smooth in the places where the mask was placed, but your skin looks very red and pissed off after removal. I either use skin moisturizer or oil immediately once it's off.

I'm not sure if it's just the brand OR just how these charcoal masks truly are. Either way, they're fun to use and it was free so...I don't have much as far as complaints.

Although I do not really recommend ordering through the company that I did, these charcoal masks are pret-ty fun. If you feel like giving yourself a spa day, there are numerous companies that sell these masks...and you can even make your own using activated charcoal powder and ELMER'S GLUE!!! Say whaaaaaaaat?!?!

Have fun ladies!!!!



Friday, February 17, 2017

Speak No Evil

I've been the victim of bullying all my life. I think what made me such an easy target was my need to be liked. Well, that clearly backfired. This is part of the reason I have very few friends, why I don't trust people, and why I'm jaded; because I refuse to continue being a victim.

As I've mentioned in blogs before, I wasn't a very socialized kid. We didn't have money, I never had sleepovers at my house; my parents refused to entertain as it was another mouth to feed. I didn't play sports, participate in after school activities or have a lot of the things other kids had. I was insecure even as a child and I never learned how to have healthy self-esteem. I literally begged for the attention of my peers. I lost my virginity at the ripe ole age of 14 to an older guy who would then emotionally abuse me for 5.5 years because I didn't know what it meant to have a healthy relationship. Bullying got really bad in high school due to that relationship ( and many other things... ) simply because 1) a girl wanted to date him, 2) someone hated him, or 3) they simply wanted to cause trouble.

Girls are fucking mean!

Along with an unhealthy romantic relationship, I formed unhealthy "friendships", also. I was fighting to keep a friendship with someone with whom I was losing to the *stoner* group ( I didn't really drink as a teenager, nor did I smoke weed but a handful of times ) I would try desperately to weasel myself into situations so that I could simply be involved, when clearly I wasn't wanted. Our "group" was usually paired off...and I was usually the odd-man-out, simply trying to fit in somewhere. With the dramatics of girls in high school, a new girl was mad at me for God-knows-what every week. And when one girl was mad, her partner in crime also had to hate me. Back in the days of AIM and Xanga, I was called names through fake screennames and anonymous comments.

Slut.

"Fat tubba tubba whale" ( this one is a quote from a *best friend* psh! )

He's cheating on you and he doesn't want you; he wants me.

Whore.

I was literally called a slut before I had even had my first kiss...

But I would forgive these people. I would allow them to continue to treat me this way. WHY?...because I didn't know any better. I didn't know how to break the cycle. I didn't know how to set healthy boundaries or stand up for myself. No one was scared of me; if I had to get into a fist fight I'd either:
a) get the fucking snot beat out of me, or:
b) rage SO hard that I'd fucking kill a bitch
And I'm not kidding. You have no idea the anger and resentment I harbor from all of this...

...and this is why I go to therapy now.

Through the years, I've learned to become ( somewhat ) comfortable being alone. After being pretty much forced to live on my own, I gained a lot of independence and self-awareness. I learned to take care of myself and not rely on a man or family. These days, I'd rather be a hermit. But when you're a teenager or in your early 20s, you just want to have a good time with your friends. Most of my "friends" were either drunk sluts, trying to fuck my boyfriend, talking shit behind my back or making up bullshit...just because.

At 30, I am just now trying to learn how to set healthy boundaries for people. If I feel you are a bully, I refuse to entertain you. Whether you are family, a coworker or my neighbor...I will not tolerate it. Even if you didn't personally attack me, once I hear you talk down to someone's face, I'm done. Because...I don't like that shit. How is it your place to tell someone they are right or wrong? If you are not signing my paychecks or sleeping next to me at night, your opinions don't mean shit. So why feel the need to voice them?...because you're a bully.

I may have shot back in retort to bullying, simply to even the playing field, but I've learned that trying to make someone feel shitty about themselves serves no purpose. A bully is already so self-absorbed that no crude words are going to hurt their ego. It's a lost cause. You're only digging yourself a hole.

I write this because I'm sick and tired of having to explain myself. I'm sick and tired of people trying to "figure it out". Yes, I'm a sensitive fucking person but do you see me being blatantly rude to anyone? No. Do you hear me gossiping about people 24/7? No. Do you hear me spitting overly-loud passive aggressive bullshit to stir the pot? No. When I feel uneasy, I just get quiet. In a way, I shut down ( mostly because I'm still working on that "building healthy boundaries" thing ) because I'm not a volatile person. I'm an emotional person. I'm a perceptive person. And also, some people don't read others like I do...so in turn, it may seem I'm "making things up". No. I'm not.

I refuse to play house with people who are not good for my mental health. I refuse to hold hands and skip through a fucking field of flowers with someone I don't trust. I WILL however be cordial and respectful if the setting deems it so. I am an adult and I will act as one.

...just do not expect me to sit around a campfire and sing Kumbaya with someone that I feel is shady. I've done that shit for far too long, and I'm tired...

'Nuff said. Rant over. Deuces.



Thursday, February 16, 2017

My "Good Deed" For The Week

...not to toot my own horn or anything; simply because I feel really good about helping someone out...

So on Saturday, I had my PetValu event for CPAA. When Tara and I were leaving, one of the girls mentioned that they had a ton of expired or soon-to-be expired food that they could no longer sell and asked if we wanted it. Well, I was in for a surprise: there. was. a. shit-ton. A few bags of dog food, some cat litter and then bags-onbags-onbags of cat food. Tara doesn't have a cat and I only have one ( a fat one, but nonetheless ) I literally had BAGS of canned cat food, litter, dry cat and kitten food and nowhere to keep it. But I took it, with an idea...


Later that evening I decided to post on the Lewisberry/Etters Facebook yard sale page in hopes of tracking down a lady. This lady ( which come to find out is actually a few ) takes care of the feral cats that linger in the wooded area down by Darrenkamps in Etters. Whenever I drive by that section of town, I see the cat houses and, a few times, I've encountered people feeding the cats. I knew that whoever was doing this probably was paying out of their own pocket to keep these kitties nourished, so I went out on a mission to find her.

I had bings immediately. I messaged a lady who's mother is friends with the woman and I was given her name and number. The following day, I called Bobbi and left a message on her machine stating that I'd love to donate the cat food to her for the cause. After some phone tag, I finally got to speak to Bobbi and we set up a time and place for me to drop it off.

On Sunday I sorted and boxed all of the supplies. Once done, I had 5 small-to-medium boxes full of food, one plastic grocery bag and a larger bag of dry cat food. 


I went to see Bobbi yesterday after work. Initially when I got there, we sat in her living room and she told me the story of her kitties:

Three years ago, she and her friend were taking a walk around the area when Bobbi thought she had seen a fox. Lo and behold, it was actually a cat. She said when all was said and done, they counted 22 feral cats that "lived" in this area. TWENTY TWO! Apparently, a married couple who had recently moved to Enola had been caring for the cats and would drive from their new home back to Etters to care for the colony; that was until Bobbi told them that she would gladly take over as caregiver. 

She's had help from the community and friends to help keep these cats safe and well-fed. A carpenter friend helped create the insulated cat houses that maintain a nice 69* temperature. When the kidney center was built on the property, the construction workers helped the two ladies migrate the cats/houses to another area of the woods. Strangers will donate money and services. It's AMAZING! In these three years, they've only encountered 2 very rude gentlemen. That's it.

Also in this time, they have numerous cats adopted out. She currently has a few of the original 22 and her partner in crime ( Joan? ) has a few herself. Today, the colony consists of 10 cats.

It's a tough job but I'm glad someone as sweet and caring as Bobbi has taken the position. The appreciation she had for my donation was written all over her face, and multiple hugs were exchanged yesterday. I not only helped her out on her mission, but I helped poor cats that were either dumped or born into their situation.

Bobbi works with Linda at Angel Pets to help TNR ( Trap And Release ) these feral cats, and they have them fixed at low cost through Nobody's Cats. As a community, they are giving these homeless cats a better life.

...and when I left her home yesterday, I smiled to myself because I feel like I made a difference to someone and to a cause

It truly takes a village...

PS. Even small gestures can make a BIG difference to someone...



Wednesday, February 15, 2017

St. Valentine's Day

In my younger years, Valentine's Day was a day where I expected to be spoiled and given lots of gifts and proven of someone's "love" with things. Luckily I've grown up from that.

V-Day fell on a Tuesday this year ( bummer ) so me, like most of the US, had to work. I went to Giant during lunch and saw men everywhere picking up flowers and/or cards. It was a madhouse of last-minute shoppers...

Nate and I briefly discussed the "holiday" on Monday and decided that we didn't want to go out to dinner because of how busy it would probably be. We didn't buy each other gifts. But Nate offered to make dinner so I told him I wanted some steak ( and we had leftover shrimp in the freezer to steam ) Our night consisted of a few drinks, a steak dinner with shrimp, potatoes and salad, and he didn't work in the shop at all


...I feel like this is Valentine's Day for adults...

He said he was going to buy me flowers, but I saw a man coming out of Giant with flowers and thought, "Man, the flower companies must be OVERLOADED today! I hope people didn't order the day of; that'd be crazy!" He also said he was going to get me some chocolate but he knows I'm trying to be better about what I'm eating and he didn't want to give me temptation. So I appreciated that. 

He did mention getting me a potential spa day here, so we will see.

As we age, though, I think it's more about appreciation and the little things instead of expensive diamond jewelry and over-sized teddy bears. Instead of buying lavish things, he did something small that was actually pretty large: he cooked for me and he spent time with me. That's all I wanted...

I hope everyone had a very nice Valentine's with their loved ones-be it a partner, child or pet. Our pups were having a love-affair all evening:


Awwwww, puppy looooove! 

Monday, February 13, 2017

My Favorite Murder

I've never gotten into "podcasts" or talk radio-type stuff, so when my friend and fellow CPAA volunteer Tara mentioned a podcast she thought I'd like, I was a tad skeptical.

I can't quite remember how it was brought up. Oh wait!...yes I do. We encountered this weird-ass woman at our event on Saturday that exclaimed that she has been very involved with PETA and other rights movements...thus leading us into a conversation about women's rights...and how it's not safe to be a woman in this world...to serial killers...to our love for true crime shows...

So anyways, she tells me about My Favorite Murder on Feral Audio. Pretty much it's two ladies from the West Coast that talk about their favorite true crime stories. These ladies have "followers" in which they call Murderinos and those followers can also post on their Facebook page their own true crime, hometown murders. 



There are a total of 55 podcasts thus far and I'm currently on #3, but I'm already a fan. It's a little different for me since I'm listening to the stories instead of watching them, but the girls are hilarious and easy to like-so it helps a lot.

Karen and Georgia are both from California and suffer from anxiety disorders, in which they are brutally honest about. Apparently then had bonded at a party over their love for true crime and a friendship formed between the girls. They are crude, sweary, unapologetic and funny as hell! 

It seems each podcast is around 60 minutes long. So far, they seem to keep to the pattern of about 2 murder stories per episode. 

The girls try to, per say, make "light" of situations to help ease their fear of being murdered themselves. Sometimes we have to laugh so we don't cry, ya know? But they surely know their stuff when it comes to true crime. This makes for a very interesting experience. I compare it to a book-on-tape; it's engrossing and you don't have to exhaust your eyeballs...

So if you enjoy real-life stories about serial killers, scorn lovers, and crazy plot twists I recommend giving My Favorite Murder a shot. 

"Stay sexy. Don't get murdered." 💙-an INSTANT Murderino

Thursday, February 9, 2017

Venison-Stuffed Acorn Squash

Welp, it's been a while since I posted a recipe...but this shit was wayyyyyy too good NOT to share, forreal forreal! 

Okay, so Nate got a doe last season and we had about 10 lbs. of venison to blow through...and, although you can substitute a lot of beef recipes with turkey or venison, "game" meat has a slightly different taste. So I try to find recipes that counteract that fact. And this...was bangin'!

Venison and Wild Rice Stuffed Acorn Squash


1 acorn squash ( fuck that shit, I used 2! )
2 2/3 cups water...huh?
1/3 cup wild rice or instant white rice because that's all I had
1/2 lb ground venison...in which I used 1 full lb
1/2 cup brown sugar ( which I used slightly under this for DOUBLE the recipe )
1/3 cup cranberries that I did not use
1 tsp cinnamon--I just sprinkled that shit until it looked good
1/2 tsp nutmeg ( I couldn't find it, so I didn't use it )
1 pinch salt and pepper, to taste
1/4 cup butter ( I didn't use this--instead, I sprinkled a small amount of mozzarella cheese on top of each squash ) 

Okay, so preheat your oven to 400* while you cut dem squashes in half. I recommend cutting them from the "stem" ( or where the stem used to be ) and down so that they sit well in the pan. Then you wanna flip them babies over face down into a cake pan and put about 1/2 inch of water in the pan(s). I ended up not putting enough water in with my squash and, even though it was salvageable, I had my smoke alarms going off like it was NYE...

...bake them bitches for about 40.

I would say that about 25 minutes in, start your rice and meat. If your rice is going to take longer, subtract the time it needs to cook from the 40 minutes and start it then ( duh, common sense! ) I boiled my rice and let it sit then started the meat. Once the meat is browned, throw in your brown sugar, cinnamon, salt and pepper. Then add your rice.

Once your squash is done, use a spatula to pick them up and flip them over...but if you have water in your pan, unlike me, drain that out first.  

If you want, butter the inside of the squash halves then stuff them. They tell you to then broil for 5 minutes but, since I just added a tad of cheese, I put that on and then just shoved it in the oven until the cheese melted.

And BAM!...a hearty, FILLING dinner with ( potential ) leftovers! 

Prior to this, I've never eaten/made acorn squash...it's so sweet and delicious! The cinnamon and brown sugar taste awesome with the natural flavor of the squash and I definitely recommend this for anyone trying to spice up the 5487465453 lbs of venison they have in their freezer!

...hunters, amiright?!

Happy cooking!...and don't burn yourself! LOL!



Wednesday, February 8, 2017

Brush'em, Brush'em, BRUSH-EM...

I don't think some people fully understand the importance of good dental hygiene. Sure, you don't want your teeth to feel like fuzzy bears but there's a lot more to it. When you don't brush and floss, you are allowing really gross bacteria to reproduce inside of your mouth. Um, YUCK!

I've been a dental assistant OFFICIALLY for 5 years now, both in orthodontics, periodontics and oral surgery. Although I haven't seen *too* much, I have learned numerous things along my way. These things vary from brushing with braces, bone loss and lumps called 'mucoceles'.

Think about it for a second...your mouth is an opening to the rest of your body. It's a direct entryway for things to enter your stomach, intestines, and blood stream. Your kidneys, lungs, and even your heart. 

Did you know that pregnant women can go into preterm labor due to periodontal disease? 

Did you know that periodontitis can lead to heart issues if not treated properly?

Did you know that a small ulcer on the tongue could actually be HPV?

Your teeth and gums can tell a story. And believe me, when you floss right before a dental cleaning, the hygienist KNOWS just by looking at the tissue if you actually do it regularly. You're not fooling anyone.

When you don't floss, bacteria is building up around the teeth. Your plaque hardens and becomes calculus ( or tartar ) which is unable to be brushed away. Without regular dental cleanings, this calculus continues to build and, in Laymen's terms, pretty much eats away at the bone surrounding your teeth. The gums can become red and inflamed. Potentially, if not treated, it can cause tooth loss. No bueno!

The early stages of gum disease is a word you've probably heard your entire life: gingivitis. Now, gingivitis can be reversed. When you have gingivitis, it's pretty much some mild inflammation that can be fixed with consistent brushing and flossing. When you see your hygienist for you 6 month check ups ( yesssss, you should be seeing them bi-annually ) she/he will do what they called "probing". Healthy gum tissue will probe 1-3mm; 4-5mm is borderline; 6+mm shows periodontal compromise and possible bone loss. 

Another concern is a possibly cracked tooth. Symptoms of this would include sensitivity to hot and cold, pain when chewing, the tooth feeling "high", or even a visible abscess. Not only will this cause you pain, it can potentially infect your blood stream causing even more severe issues. An abscessed tooth is no joke and should be taken care of as soon as possible. 

Some tooth issues are, unfortunately, hereditary. Whether it be soft teeth, supernumerary teeth or even periodontal issues. But with proper care, you can control these problems. 

1. Make sure you floss twice a day after brushing to remove any build-up that may have been wedged between the teeth. If you're not big on floss, there is the option for a WaterPik, which actually shoots a thin spray of water between the teeth.

2. Brush twice a day! If you're prone to caries ( cavities ), try to use a toothpaste that contains fluoride. If you have sensitive teeth, stay away from whitening toothpastes.

3. If you're prone to break-down, avoid crunchy/chewing/sticky foods. There is less potential for cracking with a softer diet.

4. See your dentist regularly! This one is muy importante. They can see all aspects of your teeth that you cannot visibly see, so it's very pertinent that you have regular check-ups. For someone with a healthy mouth, bi-annually is adequate. For someone with gum issues, you may be seen every 3-4 months, depending. It's crucial you keep up with these appointments.

Remember, your smile says a lot about you. A smile can brighten someone's day and can do numbers for your self-esteem. It's definitely a trait that you should invest in. Plus, who doesn't like to eat...?!



Monday, February 6, 2017

"I'm Gonna Pop Some Taaaags..."

Against what Macklemore sings, you indeed cannot "pop tags" if you expect to purchase the items; in most consignment shops, if there's no tag--there's no sale.

Sorry!

Even so, you can score some awesome deals at thrift shops even without having to pull tags! Yes, it takes some time ( and a good bit of patience ) but if you look around you can find nice designers, brand new with tags still attached or a major score like this guy

I love to thrift shop, and two of my favorite stores are right here in Mechanicsburg: the Salvation Army on Trindle Rd. and Community Aid on the Carlisle Pike. Both of these stores also participate in "Half-Off Wednesdays" which marks things down even more!

I decided on my birthday that I wanted to do some consignment shopping while Mallory was in town ( since she also loves to thrift ) so, even though it was a Saturday, we went to lunch on the Pike and then stopped at my two faves. I think I spent a total of $22 and I got 2 cardigans, 2 tops and a jacket.

Here are my scores for the day:


Super cute polka dots, looked barely worn. $4.99

LC Lauren Conrad top, $3.99

Super cute sweater cardigan I scored for $4.99!

Express cardigan $4.99

And then, my favorite item out of the bunch was a faux-leather jacket, looked to be barely worn, that I just so happened to find out of the blue:


Since I have dogs, hair gets stuck to EVERYTHING! This jacket is perfect...$7.99!

Apparently, my bill was less at SalvA because one of the color tags that I had was actually half off, so I spent a little less than what I was expecting. 

I think these are some pretty good scores for my weekend adventure. I love to thrift shop because I firmly believe that one man's trash is another man's treasure and that you can find some really awesome steals at consignment shops! Even consignment sales!; Dickinson College does a consignment sale every summer once all the kids leave for break...those who are graduating or transferring and now longer need their things donate them to be sold at this sale. It's pretty awesome. Years back, I ended up getting a free rug because my friend bought one! 

Never knock something until you try it...and if you love saving money, thrift it up BABYYYYY! ✌



Friday, February 3, 2017

Beating SAD

Oh, SAD...how I loathe thee.

Don't know what SAD is? The Mayo Clinic defines it as: a type of depression that's related to changes in seasons — SAD begins and ends at about the same times every year. If you're like most people with SAD, your symptoms start in the fall and continue into the winter months, sapping your energy and making you feel moody. Less often, SAD causes depression in the spring or early summer.

SAD stands for "seasonal affective disorder". And it's actually quite common.

Whether you deal with depression on a regular basis or only seasonally, it can be a real buzz-kill. Although I take daily medication for these issues, sometimes the winter season ( especially in Pennsylvania ) can be quite difficult. Along with the cold weather, we also deal with shorter days and the inability to do many outdoor activities...including getting key vitamins from sunshine.

But there are many ways to help beat the winter blues:

Take Vitamin D3
Try to supplement your lack of vitamin D you'd get from the sun by taking it in pill form. Although I've heard of people doing this before, I never tried it until this winter. And I really do think it helps. Whether it be the placebo affect or not, it's worth a try, isn't it?

Get up and get active
Of course exercise is good for you for various reasons, but when you work out you are releasing dopamine and serotonin that help aid in enhancing your mood. I know it's hard sometimes to get your ass off that couch, but I promise that a good 30 minute cardio sesh can make all the difference.

Get lost in a book
Challenge your imagination and leave worry aside by diving into a good book. I feel like not enough people read anymore ( especially my generation ) and sometimes you just need to flip through the pages and leave stress behind.

Learn a new hobby
I know that sometimes this can be more stressful than helpful, but in other cases you can keep your mind and hands busy with a task. Learn to crochet. Take up paper mache. Do something to keep you occupied and also, your end result is something you took time to create. Be proud!

Take a bubble bath
...because, who doesn't like a nice, hot bath?!

I know it's hard. I know it's unwanted. But you gotta do the best to work with what ya got. For some, this is only temporary...and for others, it's a constant battle. All I can say is take your meds, try to keep yourself busy and also, remember to take time for you, too.

Best wishes for a happier spring! 💙


Thursday, February 2, 2017

Millenials

Millennials. In October 2004, researchers Neil Howe and William Strauss called Millennials "the next great generation," which is funny. They define the group as "as those born in 1982 and approximately the 20 years thereafter." In 2012, they affixed the end point as 2004. ( The Atlantic, 2014 ) 

I, Jennifer Dunn, born January 21, 1987, do NOT believe I should be considered a "millennial". 

Millennial is like a bad word anymore. It pretty much sums up a generation full of laziness, privilege and cry-baby antics. Yes, I get it. Yes, I clearly see this sissified behavior. But I do not believe I should be considered one.

All generations have lazy people who don't want to do anything. People who want to live off of the system, never move out, keep shit jobs just to get by, sleep on people's sofas, whathaveyou. But to deem anyone from the age of 21 to 35 on the same "level" is gross. And it's pretty much offensive to tell me that I am considered part of this group.

As a child, I played outside. We would stay outside until dark, playing with neighbor kids or use this thing called an imagination. Nintendo and Sega were bigger, but people didn't "game" like they do now. We used computers in school and played things like The Oregon Trail and Minesweeper, because we didn't have anything else. Families didn't start buying PCs until I was in 4th/5th grade and, if you were lucky enough to have internet, it was AOL dial-up from your phone line. We didn't have cell phones, rich people had car phones and I'd never even heard of a bag phone.

When I was younger, fast food was a treat, not something you'd eat everyday. We didn't have tiny computers in the palms of our hands. We couldn't order off of Amazon Prime and have our merchandise on our doorstep in 2 days. My dad worked while my mom stayed home with us, because it was doable then. And you learned quick that if you don't want to struggle, you need to have good work ethics. You didn't see toddlers running around in Gucci shoes or with mini Coach bags full of Barbie dolls. We actually played with Barbies! We spent time with our grandparents on the weekends instead of in front of a TV screen watching Netflix or playing XBOX One. 


We got our asses whooped. We were actually. told. NO! If people bullied us, we didn't immediately go commit suicide...we dealt with it ( I was a victim of bullying pretty much all throughout high school and I'm still around... ) We learned how to talk to people, and a little thing called "manners". Dad would say under his breath in the grocery store "if you don't knock this shit off now I will smack your ass right in the middle of this store". Do that now, expect a call to the cops. 

So, what happened?!

These are MY thoughts on the matter:

People are having kids at a younger age.
Or, as some would say, "babies having babies". Those who are not fully mentally developed enough to take on the responsibility of another human being...doesn't really know how to be a parent. Now, I'm not saying that there aren't good parents out there that had their children young; what I am saying is that when you are younger, you tend to try to befriend your kid rather than parent it. This causing confusion in the parent/child relationship. Once there's that blurred line, kids are smart enough to know that they can push the envelope...and mostly win. Looking back at age 21, I can see how much I've changed. And I used to think I was so mature then. But maturity really does come with age and experience. And once you have those experiences, I think it makes it a bit easier to teach and instill important characteristics in your child.

Technology makes everything so easily accessible.
It's turned kids into monsters. I want it and I want it NOW! You don't have to wait for anything; food, movies, shopping, DATES! Do you know how many times I've gone to dinner and seen a family sitting at the table, everyone on their phones? It's disgusting. We are so busy worried about what other people are busy with that we aren't living. Some kids go to school, come home and play video games until the wee morning...then rinse and repeat. Kids don't live anymore. And adults are just as bad. Sometimes I can't even have a simple discussing with someone because their nose is stuck in their phone. This instant gratification causes the millennials to expect everything to happen at the speed of wifi, and makes them spoiled, expectant and easily displeased.

Social anxiety is high.
Kids don't know how to talk to people, plain and simple. Most of them were probably texting before they even left the womb. Between texting, KIK, Instagram, Facebook, etc...they don't know how to interact with each other. This leads to unhealthy relationships in all aspects of life. If you have a job interview, you can't just text your responses to the interviewer, now can you? And I feel with this lack of communication with millennials, there's also a lack of manners. No one knows how to be nice to others anymore. 

Disclaimer: I am not saying this pertains to ALL millennials. Just my generalized analysis. 

Work ethic, and the desire to grow as a person, are low.
Less kids are going to college. More are living at home longer...and longer. Some kids feel entitled, like they don't need to get a job. Or some are so anxious about having to go to a job that they hate that they just...don't work. Well, guess what kiddos?...we all have to do things we don't like. And life isn't fair. And you know what else?...you're parents only signed up for 18 years with your unmotivated ass ( maybe 20, tops ) Go do something. Move out. Gain some independence and stop relying on mommy and daddy to pay your way through life. 

New parents try SO hard not to be like their parents.
"I never want to turn out like my mom". Well, that doesn't mean go the completely opposite direction. Some parents strive so hard not to be overbearing, protective, strict, etc. that they end up being too lenient. The rules become more rubberized. You let too many things slide that it's now become expectation. Kids will take that and RUN with it, if you let them. Parents need to realize that how you raise your child molds them for the rest of their life! Heavy, huh?! Well it should be, because it's true. And it's a big-ass responsibility. YOU created this life and the way YOU raise it determines how they will do in life. Make smart choices. Love them like a parent, not a friend. 

Even writing this, I see the pattern. Millennials is a bad word! And I even agree with this, and I technically AM one. But you see...it makes me mad because, since I'm technically a millennial, those who DO act in this manner give ME a bad name. 

Those young people are all the same!

They expect everyone to cater to them!

Those kids are so lazy!

She's on her phone all the time!

...ecetera, ecetera...

I was taught to work hard. To take pride in whatever I do. To make smart choices with my money, because my parents didn't. Not to get pregnant out of wedlock ( even though married doesn't 100% mean they'll stay these days, anyway ) To take time to appreciate the little things. That paper books are way better than electronic. That creating something is sometimes better than buying it. That you don't need fancy things to make you likable. To respect others. To empathize. To help the less fortunate in any way you can. That you can't please everyone. That sometimes you need to disconnect the tech and reconnect to family. Plus so much more.

I am not a millennial.

I am an adult. An independent adult who works hard, enjoys naps and likes to hike. An adult who works with an animal rescue, appreciates her friends and fights depression daily...but never surrenders to it. An adult who does not feel I am owed anything by strangers and who is out to prove people wrong...